Disclaimer: I don't own them and I'm not making any money off of this. If sued I will plead poverty, insanity, and the American way!... right Duo? Duo: right! (Waves an American flag energetically and grins)
Warnings: Yaoi (Guys having sex with guys) Duo torture, Heero torture. Violence Angst. Poor Wuffie's P.O.V.. Language. Sexual violence. Really big meany OZ guys and nasty Treize.
The scrunching of snow and the panting of the weary pilots was the only sound as they negotiated the rugged landscape.
Heero led the way, despite an injured leg, striding as if his legs were the pistons in a machine. Tireless, strong, Wu Fei suspected he could walk forever and not break a sweat.
Duo came next in their loose line, but he was fragile seeming where the pilot of Wing appeared invulnerable. His breath wheezed, he shivered and huddled in his coat, and he stumbled repeatedly. Wu Fei had expected him to collapse some time ago, or at least to have complained and demanded a rest. Instead, Duo Maxwell had endured. Wu Fei wondered at what cost to his health.
Wu Fei wasn't bothered by the hike or the cold. He could have passed up Duo, sneered at the stupid weakling, even told him to go back and leave the mission to the strong, now that Heero was with them. Common sense told Wu Fei that, by the time they reached the Oz base, Duo wasn't going to be in any kind of shape to be effective. Something in Duo's stiff back prevented him though and Wu Fei had to study those squared shoulders and that swinging braid for awhile before he understood his reluctance himself.
They had been snowed in, trapped in a one room cabin for days. In that Time Wu Fei had come to understand the pilot of Deathscythe better. Wu Fei had come to understand that Heero's opinion of Duo mattered more to the braided boy than anything else. He walked through the snow, ignoring his shortcomings, to keep the respect of the Perfect Soldier. Wu Fei could understand and honor that.
Would Heero notice? Wu Fei switched his dark gaze from Duo to Heero. Heero never once looked back to check on the little idiot. It was as if he didn't exist. He didn't have time for bed partners, that grim face said clearer than words. Heero Yuy was totally committed to the mission. Wu Fei knew that the man would sacrifice him and Duo to accomplish it, to make certain that the Oz base didn't ship any mobile suits. In that, Wu Fei was in complete agreement. The Chinese boy was more than willing to do the same.
"Hot coffee." Duo's voice floated back to Wu Fei's ears. "Hot chocolate. Hot popcorn. A hot sun on a hot beach. You should have stayed behind, Heero, and arranged all of that for me. Your leg is bothering you, I can tell. Wu Fei and I can finish the mission fine on our own."
"If I hadn't dug you out of the cabin, you would still be there buried in the snow," Heero replied. "I heal quickly. The leg was sufficiently mended for me to join you on this mission. It will not hamper my performance."
Duo sighed and he looked upset and worried for a moment, before he covered it up with his lunatic grin. About Yuy? Wu Fei watched the pilot of Wing stride ahead of them. He was limping, just perceptibly. His wound was bothering him and Wu Fei began to curse to himself. He was partnered with two men who weren't ready for the bomb and run mission they were faced with. Wu Fei began to feel looming disaster.
"Don't," Heero whispered and kept Duo from lying down flat in the snow when they stopped at the edge of the Oz base. In the cover of a stand of pine trees, and crouching behind thick brush, they had a good view of the patrolling soldiers pacing along the base's perimeter.
Wu Fei pulled out his binoculars, turned on the power lenses, and scanned the base. He spotted the carriers right away, the transport for the new mobile suits. Past that was the hanger where the suits were manufactured; the weapons of the death dealing, oppressive Oz regime. To allow those suits to be delivered to their destinations, to allow the wholesale slaughter of civilian and rebel alike by those metal devils, was unthinkable. The weak had to be protected. Wu Fei was ready to lay down his life to do that.
Duo was pale. Wu Fei lowered his binoculars and looked over at the pilot of Deathscythe. Duo was shivering. Duo was clearly paying the price for the long trek through the mountains and snow. Heero helped him lean against one of their packs, gave him water he had kept warm inside of his jacket, and handed him several energy bars. Cold and efficient, Wu Fei could see that Heero wasn't helping a dear lover, he was propping up a tool that he needed to compete the mission. His flat eyes and his grim mouth said that better than words.
"I'm all right!" Duo protested angrily and pushed Heero away from him. "You worry about your part of the mission and I'll get it together myself."
Heero accepted that. He left Duo and pulled out a schematic of the base, going over it as he checked his plan and his route one last time. Duo huddled against the pack and chewed on his energy bars, watching him as if he couldn't get enough of Heero Yuy.
Uncomfortable with their relationship still, Wu Fei settled on top of his pack and prepared himself with a little meditation. They had to wait for nightfall and they still had at least four hours until then. After that, they would cut into the fence, split up to set their bombs, and Duo would hack and sabotage the computer systems. It would buy them time. Wiping the plans for the mobile suits and all construction logs wouldn't stop production entirely, but it would slow it down for months. A war could be won in a handful of months if an enemy was deprived of critical weapons.
Duo stopped panting. His color returned almost to normal and he grinned at Wu Fei after an hour of rest. "I wish I had some of your hot noodles, right now," Duo lamented.
Wu Fei felt a flush of pleasure at the compliment. He hid it with a gruff sound and a frown as he stood and scanned the Oz base again. It worried him that several patrols were close to their hiding place. He began to wonder why. They were stepping up their vigilance as if something was about to happen that needed protecting. When one of the transports began firing its engines, Wu Fei swore aloud.
"They're moving early!"
Heero glared. "Just the one transport. There must be some fighting they feel the need to reinforce with the mobile suits." He shouldered a pack. "Follow the original plan with Duo. I will take care of that transport. The resulting confusion will allow you to carry out your part of the plan more easily."
"They'll lock the place down," Wu Fei disagreed.
"Not if they have a man to chase, an obvious target," Heero replied. "I'll get into the transport and steal a mobile suit."
Duo looked tense. He began to say something, opening his mouth and taking in a deep breath, maybe to say how insane the plan was. It would have been echoing Wu Fei's thoughts. Instead, Duo began to choke on the transport fumes rolling over them. It wasn't a small, quiet cough. It was a loud, wheezing, gasping, hacking cough, loud enough to carry to the patrols.
Wu Fei had Duo's inhaler out of a pack in an instant. He shoved it into Duo's mouth and set it off. Duo gasped in the medicine and then choked. That was even louder. Before Wu Fei could react to that, Heero was grabbing Duo from behind and slapping fingers as strong as steel over the pilot's nose and mouth. He crouched with Duo. "Watch the patrols," Heero snapped. Wu Fei pulled out his gun and his binoculars. He scanned their surroundings hurriedly.
The Oz patrols were very close, but they hadn't heard. The roar of the transport's engines had saved them. Wu Fei lowered his binoculars and looked back at Heero. "We're still clear," he whispered and then started in shock. Heero was still holding Duo across the nose and mouth. Duo was struggling involuntarily, still trying to cough, making whimpering choking sounds, but he was also holding his own hands over Heero's, not to pull them off, but to hold them in place in case Heero's resolve faltered. Duo was turning blue, his amethyst eyes very wide and becoming glazed.
"Heero!" Wu Fei hissed, but he didn't move to save Duo. If he did, if those hands were lowered, Duo would alert the Oz patrol with his noise. If they were captured before the mission was accomplished, many people were going to die.
Duo passed out, going limp. Heero held on a moment longer to be certain and then he released Duo's face, holding the pilot loosely in his arms as he checked Duo's pulse. The man stared down at Duo with a blazing intensity, counting heartbeats as Duo's body drew in air with a rapid hoarse wheeze, but not the loud panicked coughing fit of before.
Wu Fei tore a piece of cloth from his undershirt. He moved forward and bent to tie it over Duo's mouth and nose. That would cut the thick oily jet fuel in the air and, hopefully, keep Duo from having a repeat attack.
The transport engines revved. Heero was suddenly in motion, He placed Duo on the ground, on top of a pile of fallen evergreen boughs. Shrugging off his thick coat, he covered Duo with it. "Leave him," Heero ordered in a flat tone. "Accomplish the mission." Without another word, he cut through the fence with a hand beam cutter, and then began running across the tarmac towards the transport.
Wu Fei bent over Duo. "I can't leave you here," he said to the unconscious boy. "I need you. I won't be able to place the bombs and hack the computers in time."
Duo was still blue. His pale skin looked translucent in the fading evening light. His body looked as if it were on the verge of either living or dying and hadn't made up its mind yet. Wu Fei couldn't give it the time to decide. He took up the canteen of water that Heero had left behind. The water was beginning to freeze. It sloshed with ice as Wu Fei uncapped it and then poured the ice water onto Duo's face.
Duo started up, his knife coming out and a wild light in his eyes. Wu Fei jumped back, barely missing getting gutted. "What the fuck-" Duo gasped, touched the makeshift mask, and then remembered. He lowered the knife, shivering. "Where's Heero?" He asked in a muffled voice.
There was a tremendous explosion just then. The ground jumped and the air vibrated with the force. A piece of shrapnel landed in the nearby trees.
"Guess that answers my question." Duo tried to get up. Wu Fei put a hand under his elbow and hauled the boy to his feet. "Let's go."
Wu Fei was amazed. The boy had just nearly died and here he was, grimly attempting to complete the mission, knowing the stakes, knowing what had to be done.
Duo staggered, he gasped, he even appeared slightly disoriented, but he moved when Wu Fei shoved him through the break in the fence and ran when Wu Fei took a firm grip under his arm and half hauled him across the tarmac. Foolish, laughing, practical joker Duo Maxwell was holding his own and Wu Fei couldn't help feeling respect for the pilot. Wu Fei had never imagined that the boy contained such dedication and will power. Glancing down at Duo's determined face, the orange light of the sinking sun highlighting it sharply, Wu Fei felt something else that was more than respect. It was a deep down, soul twitching understanding that disturbed him.
"That's my Heero!" Duo gasped as another explosion rocked the tarmac. Wu Fei looked aside and saw the transport hull peeling like a banana, flames gouting out and a mobile suit pushing through. All of the guards were running towards it, leaving their part of the tarmac free and clear.
They made the hangar. Duo was turning blue again, but he yanked off his makeshift mask, gasping, wheezing, and shoving Wu Fei away from him. "Get going! Plant the bombs. I'm going for the computer."
"No," Wu Fei wasn't a fool. "You won't make it. I was wrong to bring you. Heero was right. He knew your limits. I should have listened. I will have to attempt both parts of the mission myself."
Duo drew his knife and his ever cheerful face was shocking as it twisted in fury. "Civilians aren't going to die because of me, Wu-Man! Don't try and stop me! Plant the bombs. These son-of-a bitch mobile suits are going down!"
Wu Fei drew his gun and pointed it at Duo's head, saying through gritted teeth, "I don't have time for this! You are compromising the mission!"
"They're locking down!" Duo shouted as he backed away. "I have to go now!"
Duo turned and ran, his braid flying behind him, as he darted through some steel doors and headed for the main computer systems. He was moving swiftly as if nothing was wrong. Would his determination carry him through? Wu Fei couldn't count on it. He hurried to plant his bombs, ducking and hiding as he avoided Oz personnel and soldiers. He felt contempt for their stupidity as they ignored every security precaution and scrambled to get some mobile suits online to attack Heero.
It took time. Wu Fei sweated, despite the cold, as he planted the last bomb. The mobile suits, positioned for shipping and shut down, were now moving and lighting up, frantic soldiers trying to get them through the hanger doors. Wu Fei had to blow the bombs. There wasn't time to hack the computer now...or save Duo. He should have listened to Heero, he swore at himself as he scrambled for the hangar doors, detonator button grasped in one hand. The pilot of Wing was going to kill him if the bombs didn't do the job for him.
As Wu Fei cleared the doors, darting under the feet of a mobile suit, he blew the bombs. The force knocked him down. The rough surface of the tarmac ripped his clothes and took off skin, but he was up and running again in seconds, feet flying for the break in the fence and the security of the trees and the mountainous countryside.
Iron hard hands grabbed Wu Fei and spun him. He found himself facing Heero, the dark, cold, intense boy that could kill his lover for the success of a mission. "Where is he?"
Wu Fei was almost hanging In Heero's grip. Dark eyes wide, he twisted free, stumbled, and tried to speak coherently. "I needed him to hack the computer."
"He wasn't in any condition to be effective," Heero snarled.
"That didn't matter!" Wu Fei snarled back. "I needed him to try. I woke him and took him into the hanger. He went to hack the computer, but he didn't make it back in time."
Heero flipped out a device from his pack. He had burns and he was covered in soot. His bandaged leg was seeping blood. None of that seemed to affect him as he looked intently down at the machine in his hands, watching the tiny, flickering screen. "Mission accomplished... Duo," he read after a very long moment.
Wu Fei sighed, "Good! Then we are successful."
They both looked back at the Oz manufacturing plant. It was boiling with flames, some smaller explosions still rocking it. Duo was alive, and he was in the untouched section, but how he would escape was another matter.
"Don't return to the truck," Heero said to Wu Fei.
"I know that!" Wu Fei retorted. "The woods and the roads will be crawling with men looking for us. It will be better if we find a hole to hide in and wait until the ants go back into their nest."
"Hai," Heero responded. "We will split up and meet at the rendezvous site. Go."
Wu Fei nodded and began to turn away. He stopped and looked back at Heero. Heero was moving back towards the base. Wu Fei didn't need to be stupid and ask what the man was doing. It was obvious he was going to rescue Duo.
Mission accomplished. It didn't matter what Heero did now. If he wanted to end his life trying to rescue the stupid, braided boy, that was his own decision, Wu Fei thought sourly, but deep down he wished Heero success. The thought of never seeing that maddening grin again, or even suffering through one of Duo's shameful jokes, bothered Wu Fei more than he cared to admit.
Wu Fei waited two days in a hidden cave, wet with damp and with few supplies, before he accepted that Heero had failed to rescue Duo. Two fools in the hands of Oz, he thought angrily; two fools who knew too many secrets. Heero, Wu Fei never doubted, would keep silent no matter what. Duo on the other hand...the weak onna would crack, he was certain. Already ill, the unstable boy wouldn't have a chance against Oz mental and physical torture. Wu Fei checked his gun and his bullets and then gathered his things. The mission wasn't completed after all and it was up to him to finish it.
Finding an Oz soldier Wu Fei's size proved to be difficult. He spent more time than he wanted isolating his victim and then neatly incapacitating him before divesting him of his clothes. Hiding his pony tail under his pill box cap, he drew himself up importantly and strode into the Oz manufacturing plant with an icy calm.
He was pleased by all the chaos still evident from their attack. The plant was definitely down and the mobile suits were too damaged to reinforce the murdering Oz troops currently threatening the freedom and peace of the people of Earth. By the looks of the demoralized troops, and the sloppy manner in which they were trying to clear away the damage, the factory wouldn't be a threat again any time soon.
"Fools!" Wu Fei growled in contempt as no one questioned him or prevented him from gaining access to the plant's computer systems. There wasn't even a security lock to hack. No wonder Duo had been able to accomplish his mission even as bad off as he had been, Wu Fei thought. A child could have tottered in and done the same!
The main computer that held all of the manufacturing information was toast. Duo had uploaded his virus successfully. General information on personnel, supply service, and layout of the factory were still intact. Wu Fei sorted through files and sections, hacked through a few passwords, and then found the location of the prisoners... rebels: cells: rebel designation: 1, cell A12. rebel designation: 2, cell 6. Status: rebel 1: interrogation. rebel 2: cell A12.
Statistics on the rebels streamed down underneath. Mode of interrogation... Wu Fei winced at the graphic descriptions. Results: 0. Injuries and physician's diagnosis, treatment, and recommendations...
Wu Fei raised a black eyebrow. Someone had treated Duo's pneumonia damaged lungs, something the pilots hadn't been able to do, hospitals and top-notch physicians having been out of the question. Duo and his long braid were too easily recognizable to chance checking him in as a patient. But, giving with one hand, the Oz physician had taken back with the other. A list of mood enhancers, depressors, and insidious medications had been administered to both pilots. One pilot had been treated for burns and then treated for damage inflicted on the healing burns during interrogations. He had also been treated for concussion and contusions. The other pilot had been treated with tranquilizers, a broad spectrum antibiotic, and given treatment for...Wu Fei shivered involuntarily. He blinked fiercely and his hands turned into fists. He punched up the security codes and then shoved the computer off of the desk with a crash. Men were going to pay, Wu Fei thought furiously, there would be justice.
There was a familiar laugh. Wu Fei stiffened and hugged the shadows as two men passed him by. He had been slowly making his way to the detention cells, painstakingly using a combination of brashness and stealth to reach a point just outside of the detention block. It was the last place he had thought to run into such important men.
Treize Kushrenada and Zechs Marquis were speaking to each other as they walked slowly down the hallway. They were easy with one another, the familiarity of long companionship that didn't recognize the difference in their rank. They spoke humorously, but the topic of the conversation froze Wu Fei's blood and then made it boil.
"I didn't know that Gundam pilots were so fragile," Treize sighed. "I had him cleaned and brought to my quarters. I had him stripped, perfumed, and oiled. I placed him on a sumptuous bed of roses and embroidered cushions. His hair, my dear Zechs, was like dark amber, and it spread out like a rippling waterfall all about him. His body was scarred, but it was still like porcelain...perfection. When I tasted him, he was sweeter than honey."
"Until he began screaming and tried to murder you," Zechs chuckled.
Treize replied angrily, "He wasn't properly tranquilized. He came around just as I was plunging into his soft heat."
"He didn't appreciate being set out beneath you like a fine piece of art?"
"No," Treize said, obviously still frustrated over the incident. "He bit me twice before I was able to beat him unconscious. He wasn't the same after that. You saw him. Like an animal. Wild. Violent. Completely mad. I suspended interrogations. Only a fool would trust anything extracted from him now. The other pilot though, he may break yet. He's a cool one, very dedicated to his cause, but all men have a breaking point. I'm sorry I found the long haired one's breaking point and passed it before I realized it."
"When you are through with your interrogations, I think a public execution would be effective in injecting fear into the rebel forces."
"I agree."
They turned a corner and passed out of hearing. "Justice, my Nataku!" Wu Fei breathed harshly, "Duo will have it!"
Wu Fei began to turn and proceed down the hallway, but he ran straight into a hard body. He grunted as steel fingers dug into his arms down to the bone. Wu Fei found himself looking into Heero's murderous, blue eyes.
"Why did you say that?" Heero demanded in a deadly tone. He had a black eyes and lumps evident all over his face. His lips were cut and swollen. He was wearing a drab jumpsuit of grey and brown with a matching, thick jacket over it, the uniform of a mechanic. If he was trying to blend in as Oz personnel, he was failing miserably, Wu Fei thought.
"Treize Kushrenada raped Duo," Wu Fei replied in anger and disgust, not understanding the impact that news would have on Heero, Duo's lover. "He is dishonorable. A dog! He shall die like a dog! I will make certain of that!"
Heero went white, his eyes trembled and went moist. His grip ground bones together and Wu Fei gasped. He couldn't name the expression on Heero's face. He had never seen Heero express any emotion. This one was outside of Wu Fei's experience. It was great loss, the darkness of utter despair, and a vicious, killing rage all rolled into one, yet it was even more than that and Wu Fei was stunned.
"I've lost him," Heero said in a very low voice.
Wu Fei misunderstood. "He isn't dead! We can still find him and make our escape. I know his cell number."
"An almost impossible mission," was Heero's reply to that, still in that dead quiet voice.
"But, you escaped! That means it is possible!" Wu Fei argued.
"They thought that I was unconscious and became careless. They left me with one guard while they went to have coffee."
"Fools!" Wu Fei swore.
Heero nodded numbly and began to walk away. "I will make the attempt. If I fail, I will make certain that Oz pays and that Duo doesn't suffer further."
"You already failed once," Wu Fei responded as he followed. "I will guard your back and give you support. You need my help."
"Don't get in my way," was Heero's cold response.
Wu Fei nodded and the moved along the hallway stealthily. Why was he was risking his life? Wu Fei was uncertain of the answer, except that the thought of never seeing Duo again, of leaving him for Treize to toy with, made his heart go as cold as Heero's eyes.
Heero Yuy sat on the couch of the safe house, staring at the wall, face as dark as the bottom of a well, eyes dead to everything. It was the old Heero Yuy, Wu Fei thought from his position in a chair near the crackling fireplace. This was the Heero Yuy before Duo, the one who turned himself off like a machine between missions and did nothing but wait for his next assignment.
Quatre came down the stairs with a tray, a towel thrown over one shoulder. The pensive, blonde Arabian walked over to Heero. The man didn't acknowledge his presence. "I gave him another dose of tranquilizers," Quatre announced. "Trowa doesn't think we can keep the dosage that high for much longer. He... He isn't getting any better Heero. Trowa thinks that I should call one of my sisters... she works... well, she works with the mentally ill on L1. She may be able to find a safe institution sympathetic with the rebels."
"No," Heero said, biting out the word. "He knows too much."
"Heero...," Quatre bit his lip for a moment, choosing his words carefully before proceeding. "He thinks he's six years old and in a whore house. He-He doesn't remember being a Gundam pilot. He accepts my help, I'm smaller than him, unthreatening. He seems to think I'm another whore. Still, he starts screaming if I touch him too much. I-I guess the other whore's used to-to," Quatre choked on the words and couldn't get them out. He fiddled with the tray, cleared his throat, and blinked rapidly as he finished. "I can't help him, Heero. I don't know how... Trowa doesn't know how, either. We can't just leave him up there and drug him until the war is over. If you could go up there, speak to him maybe, he might-"
"No," Heero replied and his face went even more cold and remote. "Oz killed Duo. That person upstairs isn't him. He won't know me. He'll just think I'm a ‘customer'."
Quatre became angry, his blue eyes fierce. "Why are you giving up on him, Heero! I thought you loved Duo!"
Heero's hands turned into fists. He couldn't express what he was feeling, Wu Fei realized. Quatre was torturing him, hoping that Heero could perform a miracle. Wu Fei knew better. He didn't deal with fantasy. Quatre hadn't seen what he and Heero had when they had killed the guards and opened Duo's cell door.
Wu Fei looked down at his tea and his history book, trying to shut out the memory. It didn't work. The images invaded even his sleep, he didn't have a chance against them now.
Duo had made too much noise in his rape and drug induced delirium. The guards had silenced him, brutally. There had been blackening red smears on the metal floor leading up to the huddle of creamy skin and tumbled arms and legs that had been Duo Maxwell. His clothes half off of him, he had been wide eyed, whimpering over and over again, still pathetically trying to pull his body along the floor to get away from his now dead tormentors.
Duo hadn't recognized him. When Wu Fei had spoken to him gently, tried to get the boy's clothes back on so that they could escape, Duo had cried terrible things, things a brutalized child might say, begging, pleading, whimpering to be left alone. It had cut straight through Wu Fei and had shaken him to the core. Heero... Heero had stared and repeated, "I've lost him," and then Wu Fei had understood. That terrified child upstairs wasn't Duo Maxwell any more. Oz had effectively killed Duo.
When Heero continued to say nothing, Quatre gritted his teeth angrily and stormed past him into the kitchen. Wu Fei heard the slam of the tray onto a counter and the rattle of dishes, then he heard the water go on and the sound of Quatre washing those dishes. Almost imperceptibly, Wu Fei could hear the pilot of Sandrock sobbing. Weak onna, Wu Fei wanted to growl out, but he didn't. Quatre and Duo had always been close friends, but it had probably been the blonde Arabian's gentle nature that had allowed him to get close when everyone else had failed to.
"You're going to kill him, aren't you?" Wu Fei asked Heero matter-of-factly, not even looking up from his tea and his book.
"Undecided," Heero replied, which told Wu Fei just how much Heero loved Duo. Having watched him shove a gun into the mouth of one of Duo's guards and calmly use it as a silencer as he had pulled the trigger, had given Wu Fei a taste of Heero's abilities as an executioner. Cold, emotionless, lacking in regret... That he couldn't kill Duo as calmly, spoke volumes for his true feelings. It bothered Wu Fei. He had been taught that such relationships were not correct. He was much more comfortable believing that Heero and Duo's relationship was only that of close comrades. The present situation was making that belief impossible to sustain.
Wu Fei calmly put his tea and book aside. Heero didn't acknowledge him as he made his way up the stairs and into the room Duo and Heero shared. Stopping just inside the door, he leaned against the frame, arms crossed over his chest, and studied the figure in the bed not far away.
Duo was on his side, hands tucked up to his face, chewing on a bit of his blanket nervously. His eye were wide and childish, purple wells of pain and suffering. His long braid was a mess, tangled and knotted about him. He wouldn't let anyone touch it, even though it was caked with blood. Bruises, cuts, gashes. The Oz guards had been very cruel to that pixie-like face, but not as cruel as they had been to his body.
"Not me," Duo said in a small, lost voice. "Not me, not me, not me. Go ‘way! Go 'way!" He shuddered and sobbed, clutching at his braid now and pressing it to his face as if it were the only secure thing left to him.
Duo wasn't acting as if he were tranquilized, but Wu Fei knew what he was like when he wasn't. On the way to the safe house, they had tied him and gagged him. He had screamed and fought against them until he had fainted, complicating his rescue. More than once, as Oz soldiers had searched for them, Wu Fei had seen Heero put his gun to Duo's head, determined not to let the boy be captured and tortured again. It had only been sheer luck, and the still disorganized Oz personnel, that had allowed them to get away safely.
Looking at the tortured soul in the bed, Wu Fei began to wonder if death would have been preferable for the braided boy. What was he now, but a confused child waiting for his next rapist to arrive, too terrified to live any sort of life. As a pilot, he was now useless, all of his skill, all of his determination and willingness to die to free the Earth and Outer Space from the evil of Oz, lost. They couldn't afford a loss like that, Wu Fei thought, ignoring the deeper emotion that said, ‘I can't afford a loss like that.'
Wu Fei went quietly to the bedside. He looked down at Duo and Duo looked up at him, wide, amethyst eyes feverish and frightened. His pupils were dilated, partly from the drugs, but mostly from his mind's withdrawal from reality. Even bruised and cut, face ravaged by his madness, he was a beautiful young man. Wu Fei could see why the impeccable sensualist, Treize Kushrenada had found him too hard to resist.
"You'll do as I say," Wu Fei said forcefully, as adult and commanding as he could manage. Duo cringed in on himself. "You'll do everything I say. Obey and I won't touch you, understand?"
Hopeful, so hopeful, that expression that Duo turned on him. He trembled, distrustful too, nothing in his childhood having convinced him to trust his fellow man. "Whatever you say," Duo replied eagerly. "'K, mister, tell me- tell me what to do."
Wu Fei's stomach clenched in nausea. He willed it not to and it loosened. That was, in essence, what he intended to teach Maxwell if he could. Control. Control over the mental demons raging inside of him.
"Close your eyes," Wu Fei commanded. Duo tentatively complied. "Now, imagine a white wall as tall as the sky and wider than the world."
Duo frowned in childish concentration. "'K, mister."
Wu Fei waited a moment, made certain Duo, no, the child, was doing as he asked and not just drifting with the drugs. "Now," he continued at last. "Imagine stepping into that wall of white." When the child nodded, Wu Fei continued again. "Now, inside the wall, you are surrounded by white. No sound can reach you. No touch. No harsh word. No harsh hand. No violence of any kind. You are safe. You are secure." his words were lulling, monotonous, hypnotizing. The child was visibly relaxing, mouth slightly open, brows crinkled almost imperceptibly as he fell under Wu Fei's spell.
"Nothing?" the child asked hopefully.
"Nothing," Wu Fei assured him.
The child was mesmerized by the image in his head. Wu Fei let him drift in it, waited for that crinkled brow to smooth out before he continued.
"Duo?" Wu Fei called as gently as he could.
"Yeah?" Duo's voice. A young man's voice, not a child's.
"Keep your eyes closed," Wu Fei told him.
"'K."
"This is your haven, your center, your home within yourself," Wu Fei explained. "Whenever you feel afraid, come here, step inside, and let the peace and the serenity of this nothingness bring your mind calm."
"It's nice," Duo said, but then he frowned again. "But I don't want to stay."
Wu Fei was surprised. He had, within himself, a place just like the one he had just created for Duo, a mental safe house that he could slip in and out of at will whenever stresses became too much. Sometimes, when stresses were particularly great, he never wanted to leave it
"Lonely. Cold." Duo said sleepily and his hands covered his eyes, rubbed at them, trying to bring himself out of the trance Wu Fei had induced in him. "Where's Heero? I need Heero. I don't want to be alone or cold."
"You're not afraid of him?" Wu Fei was surprised again.
Duo smiled, lazy and warm, as he burrowed into the blankets and curled up as neat as a cat. "Heero understands."
Wu Fei puzzled over that statement, but didn't want to test that tenuous hold on reality he had just forged for Duo.
"Can I come out now?"
"Out?" Wu Fei came back to himself, blinking at Duo.
"Out of the wall. I feel sad here. Lonely. Cold. I don't want to stay."
"No," Wu Fei replied. "You're not ready yet."
"Yes, I am."
Wu Fei knew better. "No, you are not."
Duo's face went ugly. "I'm going to kill you! I'm going to kill all of you! Nobody is going to put their filthy hands on me again!"
Wu Fei hadn't been fooled by Duo's seeming 'recovery'. The child had gone back into memory, but the unstable young man was a volcano of hate; a killer wanting revenge. Wu Fei took a deep breath, bracing himself as he began to do battle with Shinigami.
Heero stood in the doorway, face expressionless, but eyes going at once to the boy in the bed, the one propped up on pillows looking like his nickname.
"He wants to talk to you." Wu Fei looked almost as bad as Duo. He had spent a sleepless night with the pilot of Deathscythe, sparring mind to mind, cutting open emotional and mental wounds and then healing them. It wasn't a complete success, not in one night, but Duo had come a long way from planning psychotic murder. Wu Fei had helped him find an eye in the center of his storm, a calm place in which to sort out the pain and the madness.
"Duo or..." Heero didn't know how to put his question into words.
"Duo," Wu Fei replied. "I helped him with some relaxing techniques and some meditation. He still isn't stable, but he can function now, I think, and hear sense."
Heero made a small grunt and then slowly approached the bed. Duo turned his head to watch his approach. "Hey, Heero," Duo whispered. "Guess you know what happened?"
"Hai," Heero said, short and sharp.
"Wuffie's been great," Duo said and plastered on sickly, cheeky grin. "He, uh, put some of my marbles back in the bag for me, if ya know what I mean?"
"Hai."
"I can," Duo coughed. Heero reached over, took a plastic cup from the nightstand, and handed it to Duo. Duo drank the water inside, wiped at his mouth with a trembling hand and then continued. "I can fight, Heero. Don't count me out. Now, I have another reason to want to bust Oz ass!"
"Hai."
"Our relationship is toast, though, you realize that?" Duo whispered and Wu Fei almost didn't hear it. "I can't- They messed me up bad, Heero." His voice trembled and then and he clenched his hands into the blanket, but he forced himself to continue. "Square one. Understand?"
"Hai."
"Might as well call it quits..."
Heero said nothing, he just stared at Duo so intensely that Wu Fei frowned, thinking of the gun and Heero's willingness to put Duo out of his misery. Duo read something else entirely in that look. Duo was incredulous. He blinked, slapped a tear from his eye, and looked away.
"Yea, well, get out and let me get some rest," Duo said roughly and jerked up the blankets as he settled into the bed. "I still feel like an Oz soldier's boot is still stuck in my gut." Wu Fei could see the blanket tremble. Duo was crying and he didn't want anyone to see.
"Hai," Heero replied, turned on his heel, and started past Wu Fei.
Wu Fei dared and caught Heero by the elbow. "You're leaving him, now?" he couldn't help the anger in his voice. Duo was vulnerable. The stupid onna needed reassurance, patience, and yes, Wu Fei admitted to himself, love; Heero's kind of love. That the man would risk sending Duo back over the edge by rejecting him now-
"No," Heero replied coldly and pulled away from Wu Fei.
"No? You are not rejecting him?"
"No," Heero repeated.
"Then tell Duo that!" Wu Fei demanded. "He needs to know-"
Heero turned those cold, intense eyes on Wu Fei, but they weren't so cold any longer. There was a flame deep in their depths, a passion that even the Perfect Soldier couldn't hide from the Chinese boy as he replied, "Duo understands me."
Heero left then and Wu Fei looked back at the bed. Duo was nearly asleep, exhausted by the night long session with his Chinese master and the leftover effects of the drugs. Still, the boy had enough energy to murmur something, half a word, half a sigh of contentment, "Heero."
Wu Fei turned away and felt a stab of... jealousy? That their relationship could bridge even that divide of mental trauma astounded Wu Fei. What did he have compared to that? A cold Gundam, the colder spirit of Nataku, and the frigid, silent 'safe place' inside of himself that was colder still. He had found it comforting, but Duo had called it lonely.... and it was. It brought calm and peace, but it didn't have comforting arms and the warmth of love. His dead wife was all he had ever wanted in human companionship and, after her death, her spirit had made him not want for the lack of it... until a braided, amethyst eyed pilot had wormed himself into the place reserved only for her and made Wu Fei long for something other than cold Gundanium around himself.
Wu Fei left the room, closing the door quietly behind him on a room full of possibilities and roads not taken. The spirit of Nataku laughed at his weakness, his foolishness, and warned him that he was close to being unworthy of her. Wu Fei sighed and agreed.
Reaching his room, Wu Fei sank down onto the floor, cross legged on a cushion, and meditated, reaching that almost euphoric level of consciousness where he could feel Nataku all around him. It was a quiet, peaceful, and orderly place, free of bodily needs and wants. In that place, he was with his Nataku and... Nataku understood him.
Owari
Kracken: OH! OH! Review me, Please! I am sooo needy! (big chibi eyes).
Wu Fei: Yes, reward the silly onna! She gave me P.O.V. in a fic!