1x2
Our Love Will Never be Shameful
By Kracken
Christmas 2009
'Though you have done nothing shameful,
they will want you to be ashamed.
They will want you to kneel and weep
and say you should have been like them.'
Excerpt from Wendell Berry's poem, Do Not Be Ashamed
"Just two more," Duo said with a sigh as he hefted his gifts more securely under his arms and waded into the next store in the crowded mall.
"I hope you have an idea, because I don't," Heero said as he followed behind him closely. "Careful, love," he warned as he put a hand to Duo's back and blocked a man, eager to get out of the store, from running him down.
"Heero!" Duo hissed under his breath. "Not here! Someone's going to hear you!"
Heero frowned, but didn't reply as they spent another hour trying to decide whether Howard would want yet another colorful flower shirt or a massager for his always aching feet for Christmas.
"My back is killing me," Duo complained as Heero bought the flowered shirt and added another gift to their burden.
Heero rubbed the small of Duo's back automatically. "One more gift, love."
Duo twitched away, gifts clashing together. "Heero!" he hissed. "Someone's going to say something! Don't do that."
Heero frowned again, but didn't reply as he lead the way out of the store and headed for a toy store.
"Toy store?" Duo wondered incredulously as he swerved around a harried mother with children and a Salvation army bell ringer.
"Toy store," Heero replied firmly and with a knowing smile. "Relena doesn't want jewelry or perfume, Duo."
"I can't see her wanting toys, either," Duo replied skeptically as they squeezed through a crowd and entered the store.
"Trust me," Heero insisted.
"Like I trusted you about that hair gizmo you thought Sally would want for her birthday?" Duo reminded him.
Heero winced and chuckled as they went to the stuffed toy section. "All right, I was wrong about that one."
"Microbraidery by Ronco," Duo snickered.
"I said I was wrong," Heero complained.
"Took her three hair salon appointments to get the knots out," Duo persisted.
"Cheese maker," Heero said simply as he picked through a selection of expensive stuffed cats.
Duo grimaced. "There was no way that I could have known that Noin was lactose intolerant. You can't get me with that one."
"But I still will, Love," Heero chuckled as he picked out a white cat with it's name stitched in pink on the collar.
A man gave them a scowl and moved away.
Duo exclaimed in exasperation. "Heero!"
Heero glanced at the man and then shrugged. "His problem."
"Our problem," Duo insisted.
Heero met his eyes seriously and said, "Maybe it is our problem."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Duo demanded angrily.
"If you're ashamed of us..?" Heero wondered
"I'm not!" Duo retorted.
"Then what are you ashamed of?" Heero wondered sadly.
"I said that I'm not ashamed!" Duo insisted. He stepped closer to Heero, so that no one else could hear, and admitted, "I just don't want anyone saying something to you. I don't want you hurt, ever."
"They can only hurt me if I believe what they think and say... and if you believe it," Heero replied. "Do you believe it?"
Duo looked hotly angry and then asked, "Why a cat?"
"It's a collection," Heero explained after a moment, looking disappointed. "She has all the colors except white."
"Let's buy it and get out of here, then," Duo grumbled and then led then way to the cash register.
With their last packaged wrapped, Duo and Heero left the store in silence, and then stood in the crowds as Duo shifted his packages more securely.
"You should know me by now," Duo suddenly said, looking down at his packages. "It pisses me off that you think I believe any of that crap, that what we have together is wrong."
"Then don't be afraid for me," Heero told him. "I'm a big boy. I can ignore idiots just as well as you can."
Duo sighed and looked up with a smile. "Sorry. I guess I just love you that much, you know?"
Heero smiled and replied, "I know." He glanced up. The giant Christmas ornaments, hanging from the mall ceiling, included large balls of mistletoe. One hung directly above Duo's head. "Are we done being afraid, now?" Heero asked.
Duo glanced up as well, and then met Heero's eyes. "Yes, we are."
"Merry Christmas, love," Heero said and pulled Duo in for a deep kiss. They both heard shocked gasps and muttered words of disgust, but there were a few whoops and cheers as well.
"Our love will never be shameful," Duo said against Heero's lips. "Merry
Christmas, love."